She raised me

She taught me lots of things

She told me to sit like a girl

… but I did not do that all the time

She told me to be good

…yet at times being good did not feel right

She told me to do well in school

…yet at times studies were so hard

She told me to stay away from trouble

…but at times trouble looked like a lot of fun or I created it

She told me which of my friends I should be cautious about

…yet I chose to give everyone the benefit of the doubt

She told me to keep away from the bad guys

…yet once in a while you end up loving such

She told me to turn to her any time

…but at times it was hard to do that

She told me to be myself

…at times I pretended to be somebody else, just to fit in

She told me many things

I am grateful for all of them

Yet I’m glad that she never forced me

To do all she told me

She let me learn

She let me be myself

She has me looking forward to the day

That she’ll tell me

That I made her proud

It takes courage

It takes strength

But when holding on

Brings more pain than happiness

You just have to be brave

… and strong enough to let go.

 

Always in a room full of people

Yet you feel so alone

 

Sitting in a table full of friends

Yet you have nothing to say

 

You want to be alone

Yet life won’t let you

 

You want to get away

But something still gets in your way

 

You are constantly building walls

Constantly letting people that are nearly breaking those walls go

 

You wish you could be invisibe

You prefer to live in your own little world

 

You look empty to others

Yet you are not in your own eyes

I want to cry

Not because of pain

I want to cry because I’m happy

 

I want to smile

Not because someone has made me to

Simply because I want to

 

I want to laugh

Not because of a joke

… but because I can

 

I want to take care of my health

Not because the doctor or the shows tell me to

… but because it will give me a better life

 

I want to make my life more simple

Simply by being happy

You thought that after all you had been through

The search was over

Finally you had found a person that was meant for you

You got ‘the best’ and you deserved it

Even when you felt like something was not right

You tried to convince yourself

… that its all about taking risks

Yet you knew that it was not right

… but it was ‘better’

You tell yourself that nobody’s perfect

Yet you know that you deserve better

You hold on to someone that will never hold on to you

You are scared of letting go

Yet you know that its the right thing to do

You are scared of getting hurt again

Yet you are not happy

… and you are already getting hurt

You are tired

… but its expectations and false hopes

… that keep you holding on

You feel weak

… letting go requires strength

… but you are going to hold on

… till they let go

… or until it eventually fades