HIDDEN TRUTH

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Pale,

No tears,

No emotions

 

Stiff,

Standing still,

Occasional smiling,

Frequent hiding

 

She had built herself,

And broke down her walls

 

But all those who came running in,

Were simply the wrong kind of people

 

They told her she was worthless,

They avoided her like a diseases,

And they only needed her,

When they needed someone to look down upon and to despise,

They taught her to hate herself,

And she accepted it

 

She tried to be strong,

But deep down she knows,

The strength she tries to show,

Is a mask for depression,

That she thinks will be her ruin

 

She wants to fight,

Yet she asks herself,

‘How many times,

Will I have to say,

I’ll put on a fight,

Just one more time’

Verge of a Breakdown

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She tries to hold back,

But she can’t,

Tears roll down her eyes,

For the first time in months

 

Yes,

Most of the smiles,

Most of the laughs,

Were all but a show

She breaks down in tears,

Holding to her head,

Not again,

She thinks

 

All the things she had been doing to make her happy,

They were only a distraction,

Watching the funny movies,

Reading the many books,

Avoiding home,

The affirmations and the quotes,

Eventually she would breakdown

 

She tries to hold back the tears,

She knows all too well,

That is at the verge of a breakdown

 

In My Shoes

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If you were in my shoes

Would you stand by me

Would you forgive me for all the wrongs done

Would you keep quiet for each mistake

Would you expect me to say ‘cool’ when you open up

Would you stay

Would you have given up on me

Would you have walked out on me

Would you have done everything differently

Would you have faked the smiles when you knew you were sad

Would you have bothered to talk

Would like to have been ignored

If you were in my shoes

What would you do differently?

Change

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They’ll never change

When you ask them to

They’ll only change

When they want to

 

You’ve been in pain for too long

You’ve shed tears when you should be forming smiles

You should know

They’ll never change

Just because you want them to

 

You feel like you’ve given so much of yourself

Turning back would be a waste

Yet you know that staying

Will make you endure pain

You don’t want to believe

That they’ll never change

 

Remember when they acted different

It was just for a few days or weeks

Just to give you an illusion

It wasn’t change

It was an act

 

It’s time you wiped off the tears

It’s time you became happy

It’s time you moved past the sad music

It’s time you saw the reality

 

It’s time you moved on

It’s time you began living a life

That’s out of their trap

The truth is that they’ll simply never change

Just because you want them to